The Irony of Condescending Syntax

"Finished," he said, speaking with that omission of syntax stupid people employ when talking to drunken people or foreigners. "No more tonight. Close now."

from "A Clean,Well-Lighted Place," a Hemingway short story

This quick passage captures another aspect of the handbook for monolingual, ethnocentric Americans abroad, Bubba's Guide to Making Yourself Understood While Traveling.

1. Speak English, someone, no doubt, will eventually understand you.
(If this doesn't yield desired result, continue with next steps.)

2. Repeat slowly in English, obviously their command of English is understandably limited.

3. Repeat loudly (and slowly) in English, perhaps they have hygenically-deficient ears.

4. Walk away, muttering insults at the ignorant foreigners.

And now there's a controversy over a Spanish version of the national anthem? Wake up, America...now may be I'm wrong, but is the first amendment limited to English words only? Que loco!